Jack and Jill...

Took a few days off... seems like each time I sat down to write, there was too much noise and confusion to distract me. I must have Adult ADD...I have been "accused" of it by a professional, no less! gave me some Rx that didn't do Jack or Jill! Now they diagnose all ages with that... crazy, huh? but how could I develop that after all these years?

 

I was always Ok as a kid, and believe me I had plenty of crap to distract me then...always some family drama...you know the saying "save the drama for your mama" In our house the "drama was my mama"...I will not delve into any of her crises, because to do so would not be fair, but let's just say she was not exactly Mrs Cleaver and leave it at that. She is now living life as a cute little ole lady in one of the city's nicest ALF's. Everybody loves her and that is as it should be.

Back to my attention problem, I did learn that I have a balance disorder, a what? Medically it is called a vestibular disorder, a what??? Well, it's like this...I feel like I'm swaying all the time and as if I'm gonna walk into a wall. OK, let me just stop here and say that I am not much of a drinker, not that I don't enjoy the devil's brew now and again! It's just that I already feel dizzy most of the time. Why would I want to add to this with ETOH?

Back to the balance thing...I went to a physical therapist, after having something called, of all things a "balance test'" sarcasm intended. Now I was not told the results of this test until I showed up in a different neurologist's office across town, over a year later with a new complaint, which now escapes me?? Anyway, he told me all kinds of stuff...Turns out all the falling down episodes or the unspoken feeling that I was gonna stroke out at any given time, or gee, here's one that has plagued me for many, many years "Nausea" and her nasty little friend "Vomiting"....all these wonderful feelings or what we in the medical world call symptoms were most likely related to this disorder...Hmm, guess I was compensating for this somehow for oh, gee, most of my life!

Well, now I can breathe, and not worry that I will die of embarrassment after being found on the floor somewhere! I will just say "Oh, I'm fine, keep going, don't need any help here...I'll get up in a minute or so"...Oh, let me count the ways and the times and the places I have fallen, but I could always get up! none of that old lady crap for me!

My husband would be walking along and hear me say "Yo! could ya help a girl out?" and then he

would turn around, see me on the ground and say "Oh, you fell again" and extend his hand as if it were perfectly natural and then we'd be on our way again.

Not that falling doesn't have a comical side to it...I fell "up the stairs" at a Jimmy Buffett concert once. I fell at Disney World and although I was scraped up, it was not good enough for any free passes or even a lawsuit, no less! I passed out and fell at Busch Gardens once and the whole family got free passes for the whole day while I spent time in the first aid station drinking gatorade and resting.

 I flew over a wheelchair into a wall, while working, and got right up with some assistance from a Spanish speaking stranger saying "Oh, dios mio!" So many more, so little time!

All in all, all these wonderful life experiences would have been missed if not for the annoying little problem that most likely developed after an ear infection as a kid...so no ADD for me, thank you, and I will pass on the nausea please! There are lots of stories about that, but nausea is only funny to medical professionals so I will spare you all that!

Falling, yes I am falling and it keeps calling me back again